time, time, time is tickin’ away

Waiting on the Department of Human Services. As always.
Our attorney cannot schedule a court date for Jeremiah’s adoption until she hears back from our adoption worker.
Our adoption worker seems to be under a little bit of stress. I don’t know if it comes from her duties at the Dept., or if it comes from her home life. One thing I do know is that she might want to think about changing her recording on her voice mail… “Hi, you’ve reached Megan Cartwright. I’m unavailable to get to the phone right now. Please leave a message, and it will be returned within forty-eight hours. Oh CRAP!”
It seems that her life is a tad bit out of control right now, so I’m not surprised that virtually NOTHING has been done with Jeremiah’s case. All I can say is, I am SO glad that termination is done. The worrying is over. Now we just wait. And since Megan is in charge of that, we could be waiting a long time.

“Dear Social Workers, I am done.”

I am getting so frustrated with the System. Reconfiguring a company has it’s ups and downs, and after having five PRM’s (social workers) in a period of two and a half years, I can’t wait to be done.

The PRM is the one that makes sure we are following the rules set forth by the Department, and they are really supposed to be a support to us as a Foster home. Our newest PRM thinks it’s her responsibility to go back to the beginning like we’ve never been certified before. Like asking about our dogs. I felt like saying, “Well, we have two pit bulls, who are very aggressive and might just kill the kids one of these days. For now they are okay, except for the three cats they ate in the past two days.” Seriously. After having four other PRM’s in my home, don’t you think they just MIGHT  have checked up on our dogs.

Then she starts warning me about certifications that are about to expire (she later admitted it was their fault they had dropped the ball), and that our stipend will be cut by 50% if we do not have them up to date in time.
First of all, who gives a rip about the stipend. It’s not enough to pay for a child’s food, let alone anything else. I felt like showing her (again) Jeremiah’s bedding, clothes, toys, and specialized food we give him. I don’t care how much I spend on him, in my heart he is mine and she can throw the stipend out the window for all I care.
Second, we have never been late on renewing any certification in our two and a half years of being Foster parents.
Third, not one other PRM has warned me about cutting a stipend. They all recognized that we take good care of our children, and didn’t focus on being disrespectful.

Fourth, it is her job to keep up on what needs to be renewed. She did not do so a few days ago, and therefore has to come back next week because SHE forgot HER paperwork.
Can’t wait until this is over.
No more Social Worker’s allowed!

why I send updates to workers

Why I send updates to the Worker’s and the CASA:

You may be wondering about that last post. In it, I said that I was posting exactly what I sent to the Worker’s and the CASA on Jeremiah’s case.

The reason I do this is to apprise all the Workers on the case of what’s going on with Jeremiah on a regular basis. Because of our continued contact with the Dept. and CASA worker, they have been aware of issues that arose with Payton, and now with Jeremiah.

Just as in normal life, the truth must be told at all times. I believe that because of our honesty and truthfulness throughout both of the foster cases we’ve been through, those who work for the Dept. are very willing to believe wholeheartedly in what we say.

On many occasions Workers have repeated in meetings what we have shared with them, having no doubt that it is true. Once, while a Worker was visiting our home I told her what had happened during one of the hearings. This was second hand information coming from me, as I had heard it from Justin (my husband). She understood this. Justin happened to come home while this Worker was here, and he proceeded to share the same happenings, using exactly the same verbiage I had. This has helped tremendously in our relationship with the Dept. I will sit in my home and tell someone what is happening with Jeremiah, and Justin will go into a meeting at DHS and say the same thing. Not planned of course, we just make an effort to always be truthful. The truth will always find us out, whether in a foster care situation or life in general.

It is very beneficial for those working on the case to know exactly what is happening with the child, so that they may help them to the best of their ability. If a child is having negative reactions after the visit with their bio parents, but their time with their parents was positive, we might surmise from this that they may be reacting afterwards because they miss them. On the other hand, if the child has a very flat affect during the visits with the bio parents, or is unhappy, and they are crying and reacting afterwards, it may be because they are unhappy being with their bio parents, and may even have negative memories associated with them. Sharing information with all who are involved is crucial to the success of the Dept. Whether that means the child is adopted by another family, or the child is reunited with their family.

I am not saying any of this to tell you how wonderful we are. No, I am sharing this because I want those who read this who might be interested in doing foster care to be well equipped. This is a strong support for the child, and I want all to know how much it benefits them.