In my previous post I talked about a training we attended with Scott Chaussee. In that training we also asked this psychologist about some odd behaviors that our foster son, Jeremiah, is displaying.
Jeremiah gets extremely jealous of Payton when we are holding or hugging her. He gets very angry and will come over to us, try to push her away, and will even hit her. We have been quite surprised by this, as he is the second child. Payton has always been around, it’s nothing new.
Scott Chaussee said that when children are deprived of something as an infant (whether it be food or attention) they tend to crave it when they begin to receive it. We have heard of this happening many times in regard to food issues in foster children, but we never attributed it to a child who lacked physical attention in their first years of life. This is exactly what happened to this little guy.
When a young child isn’t fed much or erratically, they hoard food when it is given to them (as in when they are in a foster home with adequate food provided). Scott equated this to what Jeremiah is experiencing with affection. He lacked the appropriate attention needed in his first few months of life (even the time in-utero affects this), and now that he feels safe and secure, he’s going to make sure he always has enough.
Tracy Dee Whitt
search for your favorite subjectABA abuse adoption attachment attachment issues Autism Autism Spectrum Disorder behaviors birth family bonding communication compassion CPS DHS Dr. Bruce Perry emotions family feelings foster care girl inclusion mood disorder negative behaviors negativity neglect nonverbal nonverbal Autism ODD Oppositional Defiance Disorder parenting PTSD RAD Reactive Attachment Disorder Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD) special education special needs termination therapy trauma vacation
Top Posts & Pages
- why consequences & rewards don't work for hurting children (adoption/foster)
- attachment in adoption - the first things we need to know
- orphanages in America & 5 things you can do to help
- why adopted and foster children have sleep issues (sleep issues part 1)
- how to help your adopted/foster child sleep (sleep issues part 2)
- 10 ways to bond with your adopted or foster child
- trauma focused equine therapy (adoption/foster)
- it's not "just a kid thing": behaviors in adopted and foster children
- let's bond already - creating attachment with an adopted child
- inclusion vs exclusion: special needs in the classroom